Effective Communication- a way to happiness in life.

 

Webinar: Effective Communication- a way to happiness in life.

What is real communication?

Is it just combination of only words, phrases and sentences?

Do we take care of what we speak in life?

Do you believe over what we speak that we get it back in life?

Do we justify over what we speak that we do in life?

Do you think that we judge others as soon as they open their mouth?

Do you believe that we always carry a load of thoughts in the back of our mind?

Every day we speak a lot and get somewhat the result of our communication. But we never take it seriously that our communication skill affects on our happy life. That’s why it is said that you have to think before you leap. Let me share a story of well-educated lady whose marriage with rich man led her life to happy and luxurious. Everything was good and luxurious for her. She had servants and luxurious cars for her. So, she was having happy life. But one day, she received a call from the hospital and came to know that her husband was admitted in the hospital because of the brain hemorrhage. Then she informed her in laws and parents including brother. They all went to the hospital and stood before a team of the doctors. They said to her that there was 99% no chance for her husband to live. So it was better for her to shift him to any other hospital or take to home. At that moment, her mother thought that who would marry her. The father kept thinking that how would her husband be, maybe drunkard or criminal. And her brother thought when she would get married. But she thought differently.  She called the team of the doctors and convinced them that they would have 99% no chance but there was 1% chance for his living. So they could turn 1% chance into 99 %. Further, she said that they could go better and do whatever they wanted to do for her husband. Consequently, her husband got well and return his business happily after two months. So, that was clearly result of effective communication skill. In a nut shell, we can say that we have to keep ABC of life. It means Accuracy, brevity and clarity in life. Then we can get better and happy result in life. However, we don’t know exactly what works or not works for our happiness in life. Let’s see them one by one.   

 Why do we fail to speak better and positively?

1)  We always keep rackets about self and others: - an unpleasant loud continuous noise) with others and yourself. We always keep negative about ourselves, others and happenings. So, it affects on our communication skill and obviously leads to our unhappiness. All the time, we carry such load of negative thoughts about self and others. In that we keep negativity, regret, complain and faults.

2)  We always make stories: - lots of excuses we give consciously or unconsciously. People communicate with us and we make the stories negatively. We fail to understand what exactly what they want to tell. And we make negative stories and stick to them. Consequently, we carry negative communication and fail to produce happiness.  

3)  Fixed mindset attitude instead of growth mindset: - In daily life, we unknowingly keep fixed mindset for our lives. Such attitude doesn’t allow us to go beyond our routine lives. Then we have fixed mindset which is on our past experience. We never try to change our mindset. It seems to be difficult for us and live by it and spend miserable life.

Let me give an example an auto rickshaw driver came to our society on rent and started living there. Last week. A family kept a rented room in our society.  The breadwinner of the family being an auto-rickshaw driver, he was opposed by the neighbours. They weren’t ready to allow his auto to park in a street. They resisted him on his request. Further, they told him that he would be blocking the street road. On that issue, he agreed but tried to solve it by saying that he would park his auto after 11 clocks in the night. However, the neighbours disapproved and displayed their obstinate nature. Still, he asked them what he could do to bring to end the problem.  They didn’t say anything related to the solution. They only pointed out that he should not park. He thought over it and consulted with a room owner.

                                I observed this incident from my window and came to know about the people and their fixed mindset. In this incident, having a growth mindset the auto-rickshaw driver tried to find the solution and also asked for any other way to it. But the people being fixed mindset didn’t find any possibilities. They weren’t ready to change.

                            The same type of people is seen at school, society and politics. They caused a barrier to the growth of human being and society. Directly and indirectly, they don’t like to see any possibilities in daily things. Automatically, they create lots of problems in the surrounding.

Isn’t it a serious problem?

Which mindset are you having either a growth or fixed mindset?  Do you think that it matters in life?

4)  Gossiping all the times: - Gossiping is a virus and put us into habituated nature.  Consequently, we make our lives negative and fail to produce happiness.

5)  Complaining almost about everything: - Complaining as “viral misery”. Instead of spreading sunshine and positive vibes, people often find themselves in a doom-loop of complaints: The weather, sports, politics, there’s always something to complain about.

6)  Lying:-

7)  Dogmatism: Mix up facts with their opinions  

8)  Most of the people speak with mobile instead of their family members. Further, they always communicate with medicines. They are not ready to share their sorrow with others. That affects real communication.

But we can train ourselves for positive and effective communication. Here are some of areas where we have to focus upon them

9)  Communicate with authentic and integrity:

Speak authentically, meaningfully and straightforward without hesitating ex- Mr Narendra Modi's speech on farmer bills and repealed three laws.

- Don’t see a negative part but a positive one for everyone

10)                  Love people: - Wish people well. You can’t wish somebody well and simultaneously judge them. By wishing people well, you raise your vibration and spread joy instead of hate. It makes you positive. Then you are able to produce happiness.

11)                 Keep sharing your mistakes with others truthfully:-

One of the best ways to make yourself and your life extraordinary is to accept your mistakes boldly and courageously before the world without any excuses or hesitance.

- After accepting your wrongdoings, you feel relieved and relaxed.  Then you automatically feel happy and keep your communication positively.

 - Advantage of this is that you start thinking creatively and constructively about your life and career.

12)                 Develop active listening :-

Listen to your surrounding people intensively and try to get what is in there for you:-

- Don’t judge or react while listening to others intensively, but ask yourself what is there for me?

- Always keep your mind empty before listening to others. Because you can receive the message well and apply the same at every level.

13)                 Keep growth mindset instead of  fixed mindset:-  

14)                 Keep activity of  Being, doing and having:-

Who am I?

What am I doing nowadays?

What am I having now for my life and others?

15)                 Find and look for positive in everything and everyone:-

16)                 Charity begins at home:-

6) Assignment for yourself:

Prepare a list of people whom you have insulted or hurt feelings. Then you can write a letter of apology and accept your mistakes before them authentically. Do it anyhow.

 

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