Be a companion to the child at the time of the exam.

After Makar Sankranti vacation, the students of the residential school were getting back to the hostel. I was just present there and observed. Some of the parents left their children crying and emotionally. Few parents motivated their kids by hugging and using motivating words. At the same time, I also tried to remember what and how my parents see me off at the hostel. Everywhere I saw a rush of the parents and their kids.

But there was one of the parents who tried to convince their child. He was studying in 12science and was about to appear for the board exam. The mother just said to him, “Study well so that you can score well in the board exam.” He was looking down with nodding head. After a few minutes, the father also exclaimed, “Study for 6 to 7 hours every day.”   Even his sister was telling something about the exam. Later on, they went away and the child was left at the hostel. Perhaps he didn’t say yes or no to his parents. Then I just tried to recall what the parents say to their children at the time of the board exam.

-        Study well

-        Score well

-        Work hard

-        Study for 6 to 7 hours

-        Want to become a doctor, so burn your night.

-        If you get above 90%, will have a bike of your choice.

-        Please do like our neighbour’s son who went to America.

-        Solve all set of the questions papers anyhow.

-        Read the question papers twice and properly.

-        Don’t waste your time but complete the paper within the time.

                         Such sentences we hear from the parents and others when the exam is about to approach. However, the children don’t oppose the parents and others. Maybe they expect something else from them and surrounding people. But who will know what the kids want to hear? Everybody expects that the child will score above 90% and shine their name. So they try to remind their child by this and that way. They put their high expectations upon the children. As if the exam becomes a place of war, win, and reputation for them. In this way, they abruptly disconnect with their children emotionally. Further, they dream of what their child will become before the exam starts. Then they throw lots of pressure upon the children. On the other hand, the children expect something else, but they don’t share it with the parents. Let’s look at what the students want to hear from their parents and others.

-        We trust in you.

-        Don’t worry whatever will happen to be good for all of us.

-        Take care of your health first, and then study.

-        Don’t think too much, but believe in yourself.

-        Confident of your result.

-        Don’t worry, but happy.

-        Take it easy.

                           Maybe they expect more than that. But open communication is required to remove the exam phobia. Otherwise, they will go in the wrong direction. Later on, it is too late to know their feeling. Better the parents need to connect with the children’s emotions. That can help to both of them to maintain good relation and future too.